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I need to clean. This house is a wreck. Actually what I need is more space. I have a lot of stuff in a tiny amount of space. This doesn't work out well.

I've noticed some of the comments on this blog are ad's. I don't like that. Any ad folks reading this...please stop. No one is interested in your lame ass product. Pick up your corny ad revenue and stick it some place else.

So here in NYC, we got a billionare "Mayor", mike bloomberg.(yes I know its not capitalized; he doesn't deserve that honor.)
Said Mayor and Governer Pataki last 4th of July laid the cornerstone for the freedom tower at Ground Zero. The tower to replace the World Trade Center towers. The Freedom Tower, planned height of 1776 symolibc feet would be the tallest building in the world.
Many buildings take at least a year to complete, skyscrapers obviously longer. One would think that the foundation and basement for the tower would be completed by this point right? Guess again. Absolutely NOTHING HAS BEEN BUILT. Security concerns that were brought up and ignored in the inital design process meant that the building had to be completely redesigned.
This is both a blessing and a "curse" as the saying goes. The following is the original design. Look it over and use the vomit bag at your left.



Now, i've spent a lot of time in lower Manhattan, and in this time i've had the chance to talk to a few construction workers who are rebuilding the subways and the now nearly completed World Trade Building 7. These are your hardcore, all out American steelworkers. These are the guys who walk on beams 10 inches wide, 900 feet off the ground. They know what they're doing. Imagine my shock to hear them say that the desgin could not be built! "physically impossible to build something like that." they said. IF these guys can't build it, no one can.
So, after finally caving into security concerns, the city, architectural firms, and state finally went about redesigning the tower and moving it further back from the street. The new design is this:



It's at least a little bit better. Not by much. They estimate that the project will be completed in 2010. 2010. Right. Sure. This proves even more how completely out of touch bloomberg is with the common citizen, the one who voted for him, the ones who make this city run, who make it what it is.
They say 2010...yet still nothing has been done. The new plans were released in June and nothing has been started. Whats the excuse this time mikey? trying to fit a stadium in there too? It shouldn't be to much of a surprise that nothing is done however, becuase we can't even get a mile of highway paved in under 3 years, let alone build a tower.
I, personally do not want anything built on this site. I say leave the hole as a reminder. You don't build on a gravesite. Plain and simple. Others say you need to replace lost commerical and retail space. Ok, if its that important, consider this. Much of lower Manhattan, especially the site of the World Trade Center sits on landfill. Not garbage, just land dug up and place there to extend what was already there. If this precious office space is so damn important, why not do the same thing uptown or in another, larger borough?
Why? Because the mayor is completely out of touch. Teachers just recently recieved a contract after working without one for 2 years. The Police officers recently recieved a new contract, yet firefighers remain without one, another clear sign of how little bloomberg cares about the citys bravest. The mayor concerns himself only with building stadiums, of which the city already has pleanty of and needs no more. He goes about on mindless quests attempting to get these stadiums approved.
One could look to the citys thankfully failed bid at getting the Olympics and a west side stadium. An overwhelming majority of New Yorkers did not want the stadium or the Olympics. Did the mayor hear the concerns of the citizens? NO. Why? Because he is a rich, arrogant man who does not know how to run a city. Money can only get you so far. The respect of the people is a far greater gain. You need to boost morale and make the city liveable for people who don't drive 12 cars and live in 4 story appartments. This man has failed to do that. And now he wants to continue doing it. Four more years of this headstrong jagoff is not going to help New York.
I point to the South Bronx. Yankee stadium. An American Insitution. A landmark. A place where countless memories have taken place. Now scheduled to be replaced by a more modern stadium The reasoning? "It's an 80+ year old building." That, I suppose is old, but lets move a little south, to Queens, and Shea Stadium, home of the Mets. Built in the 60's, Shea is in good shape. Yet, this to is scheduled to be replaced, with the same reason cited.
These were built in the 20th century and you mean to tell me that jsut because they're old they need to be replaced? They still function a hell of a lot better then most buildings, and sentimentally hold far greater value then any ballpark built within the past 10 years. But they're "old" says the Mayor. The I guess he's going to start razing the buildings in lower Manhattan that have been around since colonial times, such as Fraunces Tavern and Delmonico's resturant? Perhaps he'd like to update the Statue of Liberty with one of Jessica Alba? Wiping out historical places simply because of the fact your ass is to lazy to renovate and repair them is not a good excuse. If you're rich enough to have you're own tv station, spring for some crack sealer for Castle Clinton. It's about $8 down at Lowes.
Instead of spending all this money flooding my TV with lame re-election ads, bloomberg should using the money to create low income housing for people who need it. He should be cutting tuition for CUNY students...although I beleive he claimed thats the states deal...Really? then why is it called the CITY university of New York? If the Mayor would stop patting himself on the back so god damned much, he'd realize how bad he is for New York and take his private jet elsewhere. He is not a real New Yorker. A real New Yorker would have fixed this problem already.

Ok...racists...fuck off. It's getting old. So you don't like Black people, you don't get along with Jewish people. It's the 21st fucking century. There is nothing wrong with them, you're the ones who are screwed up and wrong. DEAL WITH IT. Be a normal respectable human like the rest of us. You'd be surprised what you can learn from forigen cultures too, some of that stuff is good, you should get on it. Use that part of your brain that lets you have a heart. It's there for a specific purpose. USE IT.

You moody bipolar whiny overly emotional crybabies. I have zero, I repeat zero sympathy for you. So what if it's cloudy out? It's not a reason to be sad and whiny. If you really hate the world and your life that much, do us all a favor and kill yourself. Matter of fact, do it on national TV. It'll make TV fun for us all again, because frankly no one really gives a shit which celebrity is fat and what a bum from Nebraska is doin on a tropical island. We really don't care. We, as a people like the ambient noise that this shit creates.

The people who refuse to talk to others because of their political affiliation need to be beaten in the back of the head with a sharpened basbeball bat dipped in Arsneic. So I don't like republicans...BIG FUCKING DEAL. In the course of our friend,realtion, or family ship, it's not goint to matter as much as you all think it will who I support. Unless of course the next president decides to put us all on a rocket to Neptune...you shouldn't care what bureaucratic blowhard signs a bill that will give a 90 year old medication to get laid. If you don't want to talk to someone because they have a different political opnion then yours, or if you want to dislike that person I want you to find the nearest gabage disposer, shove your leg in it and turn it on.

All of you oeverly hyped up, stressed out people are annoying. So you can't afford to get more bling on your hummer...I hope you and your hummer go rolling down a hill in a big ball of flame. There are people in the gulf section of America who don'ty even have a home. Yes, thats right, America. Not Iraq, not South Africa, AMERICA. Helping others is indeed nice, but we need to help us right now. Sitting on our asses and disscussing things in committees...surprise...gets jack shit done. So put the pen down, stop gassing up your BMW and roll up your sleeves and do something.

If you have a job, or a title, you need to fufill said position and lead with a stong, firm, but respectful hand. You need people on your said and a diplomatic soloution to 95% of the problems you could face. If you can't do this you need to be tossed into a vat of sulfuric acid in front of your family.

Oh, and we live in a day in age where we have cell phones, regualr phones, email, IM, text messaging, snail mail, smoke signals, and cans with string. So when it comes to contacting someone...if you don't want to talk to someone, simply say that. Don't leave them hanging. It really makes you look like a complete and utter idiot. The "to busy excuse" doesn't fly any more either. AS noted just a few short words ago, we have many forms of communication nowadays. USE THEM.

This being said, Fuck all.

Here we are again. 4 years past now. 4 years and a lot has changed, but in many ways, a lot has not. 4 years I’ve been doing emails and rants and speeches with responses ranging from people telling me it's best to forget to people thankful that I still among those who care to remember. I do not dwell on this day, I merely seek to remind those who seem to have forgotten.
I won't stop doing these, and i'll tell you why. First of all, I am a creature of habit. I'm loyal to many things. And to me, this day is sacred. I feel it is important for people to remember and reflect. It shouldn't be shunned, avoided or forgotten. To many people, the day means many things. I don't plan what I write when I do these. This comes out of whatever is in my head, my heart, whatever. This is pure and raw. Laugh if you chose, cry if you chose, but all I ask when you see these is that you read, listen and think about it.
The day September 11th 2001 was much like the day today is supposed to be...weather wise anyway. Clear, warm, beautiful. Indian summer some call it.
If you've ever been to the World Trade Center site, or Ground Zero as it is now known, you'll see a variety of things. In an odd way, nothing has changed. Tourists flock to the site at the corner of Liberty and Church Streets and take pictures. Street peddlers offer various knockoff knickknacks that are overpriced. Businessmen and women rush to work and jab on their cell phones. New York City at its most normal.
Step a few feet more and you encounter a tall steel gate that appears to go on forever. Imagine if you will that this gate was not there. You find yourself in the heart of it. The spot where 2,749 people were lost. Right now, it seems to be a construction site. But if you move up a bit to the corner of Church and Vesey, You'll see what remains of a concrete stairwell, maybe 15 or 16 stairs left, battered and broken but still standing. Still standing after facing unimaginable heat, immense pressure from the tons and tons of steel that lay upon it. But still, it stands.
It stands as a solemn reminder of that day. Of the pain and of the heroism and of the hope. People, scared, terrified ran down those stairs and into the relative safety of the streets. People, scared, terrified ran up those stairs to get others out. These stairs may be gone in time, removed to move on with the rebuilding process, but these stairs will mean something, to me at least. Running to achieve the dream that is living your life to the fullest.
Running is something else that brings the day closer to home for me. Last September, I competed in my first Tunnel to Towers run. The run is in honor of Firefighter Stephen Siller. Stephen was a husband and father of 5. On September 11th, Stephen had just gotten off duty when he heard the news. He then ran from the through the Brooklyn Battery tunnel to the towers. He wasn't seen again. The run retraces his steps and benefits many children’s charities that Stephen supported and was a part of.
As you continue along Vesey Street, you’ll walk up a set of newly created steps along a walkway that is alongside the newly rebuilt World Trade Building 7. It is a very quiet area, something difficult to find among all the tourists and construction. If you stop about midway on this staircase, you will have a clear, unobstructed view of pretty much the entire site.
It's at this spot that it hits me. How much we have lost. Lost over the senseless teachings of a madman. But after the anger, I remember the hours and days following. The courage and hope and overwhelming will to not let this beat us. And it is then I feel an overwhelming sense of pride and hope. There was a spot on the West Side Highway, a little north of the site, where thousands of regular people camped out throughout the recovery process. They cheered and high fived every rescue worker who left that site. The spot was named "Point Thank You."
When I think of things like that, and the overwhelming generosity following that day, I get a sense of pride unlike any other. Pride in my city, pride in my country.
Those of you who know me at least a little, know how much I am looking forward to taking the written exam for the New York City Fire Department next year, and working for the department. Every firehouse in New York City has thier own indvidual logo, each one meaning something different, from an inside joke to something that honors a fallen member, every house has something different. These logos are displayed on everything from the sides of the trucks, to the Patches that the members wear on their gear.
There is a firehouse here on Staten Island, Ladder Company 79/Battalion 22. Their Patch features a bald eagle on it. The reason the eagle is a symbol for this nation, and perhaps that firehouse is that it is the bird least afraid of a storm, the bird strong enough to soar through and above it.
It is that kind of determination and courage that makes life good for all of us again. And it is with the word courage that I will end this rant. John Wayne once said, "Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway."

I'm beyond exhuasted and i've written 3 Banner articles in the past week, so why am I writing now? Becasue I need to fill up time while i'm waiting to be appointed next FEMA boss. People seem to be either happy with the way the government is handiling the situation or blasting them. I'm not thrilled with the way people are being treated down there. Ya really gotta wonder what the deal is when we can send shitloads of aid to anywhere in the world but when parts of our own country get flooded, the government moesys in a week later with the help. But it's ok, because Micheal Brown is in charge of FEMA. Whats that? He got removed? Oh...well, i'm sure he's taking it well. Oh...he's drinking Margaritas you say? Hm...wonder what the people in Biloxi are drinking...oh thats right...NOTHING! because they died waiting for lard ass to get crews down there.

I remember seeing a story somwehere about a couple from New Mexico who drove to New Orleans with their swamp boat to rescue people. Then of course there is the New York contingent of FDNY and NYPD who went down there with "The Spirit of Louisiana", a rig donated by their residents after 9/11. This type of help in the fire service is commonly reffered to as mutual aid. In times like this, this is the best mutual aid imaginable.

Another good thing to come out of this is the shockingly excellent news coverage. As Jon Stewart said... "it's amazing to see that these people have legs." Be it Geraldo Rivera tearing up while holding a baby, Shepard Smith essentially telling Sean Hannity to fuck himself, Anderson Cooper giving a senator an ass whipping of a speech or my personal favorite, Channel 2's Lou Young helping people out of the water, the fact that the press is helping out more then certain other agencies is nothing short of amazing.

It's going to take years, perhaps even decades, but I have no doubt in my mind that New Orleans and the gulf coast will rise once again with a spirit only the United States of America can muster. And i'll gladly take a vacation down there.(I'll take a vacation damn near anywhere at this point.)

Lance Armstrong. People need to lay the fuck off the man. Someone tried suing him today cause he wouldn't help them open a bike shop. Then the steroid allegations. Listen to me, everyone. The man is amazing. He beat an illness in a way that no one else could. He did the unimaginable and won that race 7 times. 7 times. You know how hard it is to win it once? or even win a stage of it? 90% of the earths population couldn't do it and hes done it 7 times. He's been scrutinized and tested more times then I can count and people still send accusations his way. "He's doping." "He is using performance enhancing drugs." Fuck you. Admit that the man is great and is doing great things worldwide and be graceful in defeat you whiny stuck up fucktards. I'm fucking sick of it. Leave him alone.

So close, yet not so close. Lost. Don't know what the hell to do.

On April 5th 2005, ABC News anchor Peter Jennings announced to the world that he was battling lung cancer. It had been specualted for weeks that something was indeed amiss in regards to Jennings, who had missed covering the Pope's passing. When he announced his battle, he stated with strong will that he would be back. Everyone, myself included knew that he would be. Over his 50+ years of journalism, he had exhibited a tenacity unlike any other. It is that tenacity that made it much more shocking to hear that Mr. Jennings had passed away yesterday at the age of 67.

I had always been a news buff and had a great deal of respect for Mr. Jennings and his ability to throw himself headlong into a story. Not many journalists can do what he did, and many of todays journalists will have a lot to live up to to even approach the level of professionalism and compassion that he exhibited almost nightly.

He stayed ont the air for 60 hours during the September 11th attacks. He covered the civil rights movement and gained the respect of minorities when few could. He covered wars and tragadies, elections and scandals and did it exemplaryly.

He will be sorely missed.

Well...I gotta say...this is probably going to be an interesting day to say the least. Interesting week too. It's 4:45 am so I really don't care how I spell. Oh and this...scares me

I find this entirely too amusing:

http://gorillamask.net/nintendochoir.shtml

I haven't been sleeping well and this bothers me. I'm not sure why. I have what feels like a chicken or some kind of bone in my throat. Again. And it's on and off, this bothers me.

I still haven't picked a color for the room. I shoulnd't be putting this much effort if I plan to be out of her in 2-3 years, but I want those 2-3 years to be as comfortable as possible...hahaha, like that'll actually happen.

I should call Time Warner Cable and have them give an extnsion to the cord and give me a new cable box and remote seein as how mine hate me now, even though i've given them years of work.

I need a color ink cartrdige for my printer.

Banner people want me back. It's nice to actually be wanted for something good for a change.

Kirstie Alley scares me. Can't we float her out to sea already?

I just saw a commercial for old people fucking in a bed.

Vote Gifford Miller.

Serria Mist is not bad.

I'm hording batteries...and I don't know why. The anniversary of the blackout is coming up, that should be fun. If it happens again, it'd be nice to have both of my arms functioning and temps under 90.

Ok, so yea..I'm pissed. I'm very fucking pissed actually.

What exactly is the meaning of the word "friend"?

I've been pondering this a lot lately. To me a friend is someone who is always there for someone. Examples; A friend will pick up the phone at 4am when no one else will to quell your fears about traveling. A friend will walk around in any weather to help you deal with your girl or boy troubles. A friend will meet you at the train station and walk you home, despite it being 105 degrees or -5 dgrees. A friend will visit you at work when you're having a bad day. A friend will offer advice on what car to buy when asked, despite you not listening to it and buying a different car. A friend will help promote whatever band you're in this week, listening to demos even though they have to study for a test. A friend will lend you their phone so you can do whatever possible to save your realtionship. A friend will cancel all other plans in order to spend time with you after you came in from out of town and passed out somewhere else drunk leaving them hanging. A friend will look at all your writings and or drawings, and honestly tell you what they think of them. A friend will make an effort to get to know your family. A friend will cook for you whenever, wherever. A friend will visit you when you are sick, not caring if they too will get sick, or at the very least will call to see how you are feeling. A friend will give you opportunites to further yourself in life. A friend will call on your birthday and offer to take you out even though they don't have a job or money. A friend will ask how the family is and actually be willing to hear stories about them. A friend will offer to help move. A friend will be a tourguide to other out of town friends. A friend will be there, 24/7/365, becasue that is what FRIENDS are supposed to do.





I've done all of this. ALL OF IT.

So when I call someone or email someone and ask them, "Hey, want to hang out?", "Wanna chat?" I at the veeeery least expect some kinda response, not a voicemail, not to be answered at all or for weeks on end, not a no answer, not a "i'm tired." I don't think its much to ask to just talk or hang around, I really don't, but apparently some people do, despite the fact I would do anything for them. And to these people, I guess i'll just simply say, enjoy your life, thanks for using me, and Fuck You.

This Wednesday, July 13th 2005 marks a special day for the United States Of America. It marks our nations return to space. For the first time since the Space Shuttle Columbia was lost on Feb. 1st 2003, Americans will fly into the heavens on a craft built in the U.S.A., the Space Shuttle Discovery will carry a crew of seven astronuats, including commander Eileen Collins into space for a service mission to the International Space Station(I.S.S.).

"We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade, and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard." was one of the key points made in a speech by John F. Kennedy on September 12th, 1962. Well, we achieved that goal.

Now, faced with an uncertain future, Those words and those goals seem more distant then the nearest star, Proxima Centauri, which is 4.24 light years away.

Many people have a severely pessimistic view of our psace program. But think of this; Many of the products we now don't even give a second glance too probably wouldn't exsist in their present form without the innovations made by NASA crews. Your microwave, cell phone, computer, hell even some of your pillows and matteresses all owe themselves to NASA. If it wasn't for them, you might not even be reading this.

Those of you who use air travel, a lot of the safety innovations in modern day aircraft were made by the U.S. space program and it's subsidaries. Boeing, Lockheed Martin, Northrop Gruman, all these companies have major ties to NASA.

On January 27th, 1967, the crew of Apollo 1, Ed White, Virgil "Gus" Grissom, and Roger Chaffee perished in a fire during a simulated launch exerscise at Kennedy Space Center. Much of the launch tower where the tragedy occoured is gone now, but part of it remains, on one of the walls is a plaque.

The Plaque says "Ad Astra Per Aspera", translated, it means "A rough road leads to the stars."

It has been a rough road indeed, but if you've ever seen a shuttle launch, be it in person, or on televsison, you have to admit, it is indeed an awesome sight.

Personally, I get a chill and a bit watery eyed every time I see one. Rarely do I have more pride in my country then when I see American ingenuity roaring skyward on machines that are the most complex craft on the planet.

This is something that our country cannot simply turn a blind eye to. Are we that jaded that we can't stop for a bit and marvel at the extraordianry sacrifices these men and women are making for us? They have families just like us, they have a paycheck, just like us.

They're daring to dream and use their imagination which is something many people seem to have forgotten how to do. When that shuttle goes up wednesday afternoon at 3:51, will you realize this?

We can't forget about the hopes and aspiriations of these indviduals any longer. When President Bush made his speech on January 14th, 2004 about going to Mars, many people laughed it off. When Kennedy made his speech, many people cheered. Has our nation really lost it's imagination that much? Imagination is what got us to the moon in the first place. I for one applaud the notion of visiting other planets. Thats right, I'm proudly admitting the fact that going to Mars is a good idea.

For too long now, Americans, and people the world over have lagged behind in giving thought to this notion. Many people say that there is nothing out there to see. People laughed at Tom Cruise and at others who believe in extra-terrestrial life.

Well for those of you I have a quote from the famous astronomer Carl Sagan. "If it is just us, seems like an awful waste of space."

Think of that for a while. This a wonderful opportunity to explore, Another thing many people seem to have forgotten how to do. It's a chance to go on the ragged edge and see things that have never been seen, its a chance to open new horizions and expand our knowledge.

The crew of the Columbia, the Challenger, and the crew of Apollo 1, all of whom gave their lives for their country should not have passed away in vain. They want us to continue reaching for the sky. What they did is not heroic, it is legendary.

If this isn't enough to make you beleive, I want you to go find a secluded area, a dark field, a quiet spot on the beach away from everything, and look up at the sky one night. Look up and just wonder for a bit. Stare up and look how beautiful it is and wonder and hope and dream. Dream.

It's 4 am...do you know where my socks are?
I am cleaning at 4 am and it's hot in my room.
My room needs to be repainted, ideas?
I'm watching the Weather Channel, big surprise? There's a commercial on for Oreck vaccum cleaners.
I have a ladder in my room with a bungee cord and i'm thinking of seeing if i can hang from it and swing around the room on it and then go get some orange juice.
It's supposed to rain later today. Boo.
I should do some dishes too.
I'm probably goning to wind up cooking a whole lotta chicken for just myself on Saturday night unless I get someone or a few someones to come here. Open invite to anyone reading this. Though, those who do read this probably won't read it untill at least 2 weeks from now so the point is moot.
This commercial is still goin. No one informed me that a vaccum ad would ruin my watching of the weekly forecast for Nebraska.
For shame. Stupid vaccum. I find it unfair that the one on TV works and mine don't. This is one of the many reasons I can't see much of my floor anymore.

Walter Peck and the EPA can suck it.

I've been spending some time off Staten Island lately. Many of you who read this...all 4 of you know how much I enjoy and love this city. It's hard to explain exactly why I do...I don't suppose there is one word, nay seven words that can explain why and how much I love this town...but there are examples.

Only in New York City will you see some guy dressed in just cowboy boots, briefs and a cowboy hat entertaining the masses in any weather. And only in New York City will he actually make sense and make a crappy day good.

Only in New York City will you see 55,000 screaming fans go from cheering for a baseball team to cheering for an insane fat man running down a stadium staircase.

Only in New York City would you find a museum devoted to mass transit and its history....in an old subway station.

Only in New York City will you get away with naming a town Flushing and not have to many jokes made about it.

Only in New York City will you run into an old friend...and another...and another...and another, and actually enjoy it, because it's one of those things that "only happens in New York."

Even before Rudy became mayor, people from all over loved this city. Some people may say they don't like it, some may be afraid of it, but for a long, long, lonnnng time now, we have always welcomed everyone with open arms (or in John Rockers case open fists.)

Some may not like to admit it, but they are proud of this place. I sure as hell am. This is why I enjoy showing it off. This summer i'm going to be showing more people around town then I ever have before, and for some unexplainable reason...i'm giddy as hell about the thought of it. I secretly love seeing the awe and wonder on peoples faces when they get off the subway in Times Square.

I love smelling the New York City air, however bad it may be while riding the Staten Island Ferry. And I love seeing people look over at the Verrazanno, jaws to the floor at how long it is.

And, cause it's me and I can't call this an offical blog post without someway mentioning my guys...I love seeing people wave at firefighters and ask for pictures. Cause you know that those outta towners...when they go home, they'll tell their friends and realitives, "I met a New York City Firefighter."

I got a friend in Texas, who told me she has a wall of New York City stuff. Another friend in Alaska, who is probably the most New Yorkiest Alaskan in the state. My friend Joe, though he may go to school in Pennslyvannia, has a sticker on the back window of his car that says, "PA Plate, NYC Driver", just to let everyone know that he is a pride Yankee, A born and bred New Yawkah.

New York City is...it's something magical. It may be a sauna right now, and it might as well be the tundra in January, but even at those times there are certain things that make it something to see...be it the helpful guys on the street ready to give you an umbrealla in the middle of a summer thunderstorm(even though theyre usually cheap and last 10 mins, but it really is the thought that counts here, just go with me.), or the random stranger who will help you push your car out of a winter snowdrift...it's the spirit of the city that makes it what it is.

Some say that our post 9/11 caring and thoughtfullness has gone. It hasn't...it's always been there, before and after that September day. Remember the blackout of 2003? The unbearable heat? The hours of darkness? Ok...now do you remember that stranger who helped you out of a dark subway tunnel? That was a New Yorker. Remember that really good movie you saw on your first date? The one where Meg Ryan was having a moment in the diner? That was Katz's deli in Manhattan.

We do things our own way here, we're more unique then unique. It's hard to sum up in words why I love New York City....but I think I just began trying.

I'm angry at Canada and California.

First i'm angry at Canada for their stupidass mounite police. Their dumbass pants annoy the piss out of me. It looks like they have godammned racoons in their drawers. If, by any horrible chance I find myself in Canada and I meet a mounite...so help me god if I don't kick him in the crotch for wearing those things, unless in fact he has already kicked himself in the crotch for wearing them. Why...why must you wear STUPID PANTS?!?!?!

While I was thinking of that...I thought of how Canada had to mess up ham or bacon or whatever it is...I don't know what they call it up there....it's bacon here but ham there...why can't they just friggin have what we have instead of confusing a simple food?!?! Why Canada!??! WHY?!?!

I'm angry at California for stealing every good police chase. I was talking to Kaia last night and we were discussing the time one of the more inebrated citizens decided to walk on to a military base and take a tank out for a leisurely drive through a nice quiet neighborhood. When I say through a neighborhood, I mean actually through it. Houses, campers, cars....he tore ass through it like a movie. After a few minutes or hours of running around in said town he decided to go on the freeway with pretty much the entire state police about 5 miles behind all the while this is of course making news everywhere...even had the live audio feed of the cops asking "See anyway to stop this thing?" to which another cop says after a few seconds of silence; "no....he's driving a tank." How does this end? The smart tank driver gets stuck on a freeway divider. Millions of dollars go into devolping these things and a little concrete wall beats it. Only in California.

Can anyone explain to me what the fuck is wrong with the world???

How is it that weirdass former humans that molest kids get to walk off scott-free? and don't say it's the money. Money had nothing to do with it here. Martha had money and she went away. The problem is with the California judical system. Now, to my friends out there on the left coast, I have nothing against you...it's your ass backwards "justice" system that irks me. When the press, who by the way went apeshit overboard with this whole trial, when they interviewed the jury, one of the jurors claimed that the mothers behavior was a bit eratic. Now...the last time I checked...was it not the kid who was getting molested? What the hell should the parents behavior have to do with the kid getting screwed with my Jacko? And are we all forgetting how fucking bizzare that thing is? And yes i'm not going to refer to that biomechincal expierment gone wrong as a "he." Anything that has noses fall off on a regular basis and was once an african american but is now whiter then Donny Osmond in Harlem is not a human anymore. This....thing dangles it's own children off balconies, and lives the life of a child...this is not behavior that should warrant a passing "oh well." This thing needs to go away for a long time. My faith in the justice process has been seriously damaged today.

And speaking of overly rich indivduals who are spoiled and shouldn't be getting what they want but are...And I know i've beaten this horse into the ground quite a bit, but bloomberg...wow...i'm actually seething about this Olympics "deal." A few people asked why I didn't talk about it much when State Assembly Speaker Sheldon Silver last week shot down the West Side Stadium proposal in favor of rightly continuing to push for further progress downtown. I didn't talk about it becuase I wanted to wait for the July 6th vote from the IOC. If anything, I knew that with the way New York politics work, this thing would not be done till at least then.

Boy was I right. As i'm preparing dinner Sunday night, NY1 comes in with breaking news. Seems that a deal was reached with the Mets and Yankees for a stadium to be built on what is now a parking lot for the Mets Shea Stadium. Once the new stadium is built, Shea, which is only roughly 40 years old will be torn down. If we get the Olympics, a years worth of time and a shitload of public money will be used to convert the stadium from a 45,000 seat facility to an 80,000 seat olympic stadium, all the while the Mets will be playing in a proposed new Yankee stadium in the Bronx.

Ohhhh...where to begin with how wrong this one is.

Wellllll...Shea for starters and as previously noted is only around 40 years old. As far as buildings in NYC go, thats practiclly a decade. Strcturally...there is nothing wrong with the place. The Mets never fill the stadium, even on a good weather or game day a good 30% of the seats are empty. Now why would there be a need for a new stadium if you can't fill the old one? And the last I checked...the Mets aren't exactly World Series contenders.

Now...the area around Shea for the most part is kind of barren with the major exception of Flushing meadows Corona park, most notably featured in the end of "Men In Black." So one would think that not many people would have an issue with building around there. Wrong again! Where the proposed Media center would go presently lies a bevy of auto-body shops and the homes for the people who work there. These aren't the high-class auto body shops, these are mom and pop shops being run by people who are just barely making enough money to feed their families. Where pray-tell will the city put these people? That deafing silence you hear is the answer the bloomberg administration has.

Now for the Yankee part of this deal. This hasn't been talked about to much. Now, I don't know how many people who read this are Yankee or even baseball fans...but Yankee stadium is more then just a building in the Bronx. This is a New York City landmark. It has been home to everything from thrilling World Series Championships to knock down boxing matches to Prayer services for those lost on September 11th 2001. It holds more memories then all the ballparks in the major leagues combined. To simply give it up would be a devastating loss to the city of New York.

Now lets do my least favorite part. Lets look at the numbers.

The new Mets stadium would cost $600 million. This would thankfully be payed by the Mets. The city would pay $85 million, while the state would pay about $75 million for infrastructure improvements around the area of the stadium. If we win the olympics, the citys olympic administration, NYC2012 would kick in $142 million while the city and state would kick in $108 million. Hold on....did anyone ask the public if they want this? I certianly don't, and I know a great many people who would not like to see their money go to another stadium while our Fire Departments and Schools need the money. What is that bloomberg was saying about not having enough money to improve public transportation on Staten Island? But we have enough for the olympics? The olympics which a majority of the people probably don't want...

I get pissed god dammit!!

I was speaking to my buddy Mellissa on her cell a few minutes ago. Her part of the island is experiencing a blackout right now. It's interesting how most phones won't work during a blackout, yet cell phones do. It's amazing how the cell phone has changed New York City. Seems like everyone has at least one cell, some have two and i've heard of some higher ups in city government having as many as 4.

It's ironic then that our subways, the most famous in the world are not wired for cell phone service. This means if you're underground and need to make a call...you're outta luck. This is not good for a major city that is as susceptible to attacks and disasters as ours can be. Blizzards, terrorist attacks, heat or Canada induced blackouts(it's their faualt dammit. This is my blog and my opnion. They messed up toast.) have proven how un-ready the MTA is in the event of an emergency.

By know everyone knows how people were trapped for hours in the subways during the 2003 blackout. The MTA royally messed up. Supposedly they didn't know where all the trains were when the power went. Say a woman was giving birth or an elderly man was having heart troubles and they needed to be evacuated quickly. Certianly a cell phone could have helped.

Washington D.C. , Santiago,Chille, Madrid,Spain and Singapore all have their mass transit systems wired for cell service, yet New York...the city that spearheaded and pretty much created modern day mass transit, the city where all the innovations should be happening...has essentially paddled water on the subject. They claim there looking into it. But last time I checked, when they look into things...nothing seems to happen other then empty promises. As my friend Colby once took a jab at there slogan... "MTA, going your way....if your way is standing still."

3am and i'm writing. And for a change it ain't a crackpot movie script idea or Banner article. I don't know where i'm going with this so tighten the seatbelts on whatever piece of Staples or Ikea made office furniture your ass is sitting in right now.
I'm going to be 23 on the 21st of this lovely, scizo weather month. 23 and I don't look forward to it. Could be due to the fact that the past few years of my life haven't excatly been stellar. Most of you know the sob story. For those that don't...I don't exactly feel like going into detials...but for the sake of giving this part of the story some depth...Lost my mother, Lost my job, lost faith in some "friends", and basicly lost trust in almost all humanity.
Everyone gives the usual line of "It'll get better, just wait." Well, for an impatient person such as I, waiting is for lack of a better term...stupid. I've dealt with the rough blows and pitfalls for long enough at this point and I feel as though I've waited long enough. I'm not out looking for pity. I don't want a handout, I don't even want a pat on the back. I just want a good break.
I'm not saying my life is terrible. I know for a fact that compared to others, I've got it good. I got a nice home, got food and something resembiling a modern American family.
In the past 23 years i've learned that holding on to things is not entirely a bad thing as some have thought. People tend to try and forget the past and look to the future and blindly think that there problems will be solved by some amazing machine. Way I see it, you can't go forward unless you go back a lil bit. Though, try as I have, I can't seem to look back and find the answer as to how to help pull through this pit that has been the last few years of my life.
Now before all 2 of you who read this get nervous..I ain't planning on going anywhere or doing anything drastic..save for maybe buying a pair of shorts.
And not everything has been doom and gloom, as evidenced by the fact i'm not pale white and dressing in all black saying "life is death and I hate the living."
This also could be that pre/post birthday blues manifesting itself in some sort of 3am rant that i'll forget about when I wake up in the morni...er...afternoon. This could also have to due with the fact that I had a conversation with a friend tonite in which I was given praise on some of my previous rants and encouraged to write more. Frankly I didn't think the rants were that great and I'm not sure what to write about now so i'm just emptying whatever is left of my brain for the day on to here. I'm sure it'll stop making any sense shortly, that is if in fact it has made any up till now.
I still disagree with said friend in regards to my writing ability. I just put down what I feel and hope it makes a little bit of sense. Most of the time it has something to do with the FDNY, so for me that makes sense. And now I can offically say this makes sense cause i've mentioned the FDNY.
Speaking of which, I visited Staten Island's newest house today, Engine Company 168. The house isn't exactly new persay. It was built over a year ago, but thanks to the shitheaded excuse for a mayor, didn't get an Engine. It did however get am EMS Battallion. The house, which is in the Rossville section of the island, is enormous, with the ability to hold at least 2 engine and 2 truck(ladder) companies. That part of the island has been one of the many that is suffering from rampant overdevolpment and an immense population boom. Yet up untill now, had very little fire coverage. So after presure from my boy, City Council speaker and Democratic mayoral hopeful Gifford Miller, and councilman Jim Oddo, we finally got the Engine. We still need more though. But i'll save that rant for a later time.
So what else is there to write about? At this point of the night, after the week and day and year i've had my brain is pretty well fried. I could write about how I hate being 22 and still single but everyone under the sun has hear that 40 million times at this point. I could write about how my back and shoulders are killing me but then i'd be sued by Major League Baseball for using one of their storylines(even thats scripted folks.)I could write about how todays weather was more fun then a barrel of monkeys but then i'd be lying. I could also write about how I have the most comfortable bed ever, but instead I think i'll go sleep in it. G'nite. And have a Pleasant tomorrow.